Board upholds decision to shun memorial services at Strom
Rockport — The Five-Town Community School District Board voted Wednesday, July 11, to reject a request to allow a memorial service to take place in Strom Auditorium for a well-known community leader. A request was made to hold a memorial service for Ken Bailey, who passed away Tuesday, July 10, because the facility can accommodate more than 800 people.
Dr. Nick Ithomitis, principal of Camden Hills Regional High School, said the school does not have a "policy" about hosting memorial services at its facilities. He explained the decision is at the discretion of the principal.
"I know there's an issue out there with the community," Ithomitis said. He said there had been a "lengthy and lively" discussion about the request to use school facilities for Bailey's service at the July 11 school board meeting after administration initially denied the request.
"Everyone on the board saw both sides," he said, "[Saying no] was the best hard decision to make."
Ithomitis explained that the school has taken the position that funerals and memorial services are "hard to have at the school." He said hosting funerals at the school "somewhat sensationalizes issues to kids."
Ithomitis said the decision to reject the request — which was upheld by a 5-3 vote with one member absent and another abstaining at the school board meeting — "was not one of insensitivity." Instead, he explained, it was one of "sensitivity towards the students."
Five Town CSD Board member Robert Lawson said the discussion at the July 11 meeting was a difficult one.
"It was definitely one of the most heart-wrenching discussions I've participated in on the board," Lawson said. "Everybody could understand both sides of the discussion."
Lawson ultimately voted to uphold past practices by rejecting the request to hold Bailey's memorial at Strom Auditorium. He said the powerful desire to honor Bailey and support his family was met with the need to "maintain some semblance of equity." Lawson said other requests to hold memorials and funerals at Strom Auditorium have been denied and breaking that practice ultimately felt like a disservice to those whose requests had been denied in the past.
"The board and administration was in an awkward and difficult position," Lawson said.
Ithomitis also said it would be difficult to give the green light to one service and say no to another.
"I don't place a value on an individual life versus another individual life," he said. "We don't bring [funerals] into the school."
Ithomitis said he has not received any direct requests to hold funerals at the school prior to this week. He said Strom Auditorium was the venue for a staff member's memorial service in 2005, but that the decision had been made far in advance and administrators later decided not to use Strom for gatherings of a funereal nature again. According to previously published reports, other requests have been made — and denied — in the last several years.
Edmund Hartt of Lincolnville voted in favor of honoring the request to hold Bailey's service at the Strom. He said some of the reasoning — including discussion of a rash of suicides that plagued the high school nearly a decade ago — did not resonate with him.
"My contention was that Ken Bailey is not a student," Hartt said. He said certain factors, like the fact that school is not in session now, should have been considered.
"There are a lot of nuances that could have been looked at but were not," He said.
He said, as a member of the board, he supports every decision it makes, but feels that in this particular case, "[Principal Nick Ithomitis] should have said yes."
Hartt also serves as the chairman of Lincolnville Central School Board and said the board and principal of LCS would have agreed to host Bailey's service if a request was made to use the school facility.
Ithomitis said July 13 that he had received two phone calls in regard to the school board's decision against hosting the funeral. He said both callers were reasonable and understood his explanation of the decision, though they both originally contacted him to ask for a reconsideration or clarification of the decision.
According to a portion of Camden Hills Regional High School website dedicated to Strom Auditorium, the facility "belongs to the people of Appleton, Camden, Hope, Lincolnville and Rockport." The website states that while "the Camden Hills Regional High School and its associated programs have first priority of use, whether students are the performers or the audience. Second priority for use includes all other public schools in the five town region. In addition, the School Board wishes to make the auditorium available to organizations, municipal groups or individuals within the district who wish to sponsor appropriate civil, cultural, educational, recreational or political activities as long as these activities do not interfere with the conduct of the school programs and are in the best interest of the school system."
Courier Publications reporter Jenna Lookner can be reached at 236-8511 or by email at jlookner@courierpublicationsllc.com.
a comment. I attended a memorial service/funeral in Thomaston at the high school for a State Trooper who died tragically on rt 1. It was a large auditorium, i do not know if there were issues for students; certainly none were reported. It is a building, it doesn't sound like it is being used to promote any religious or political agenda. Not sue how this would have a negative impact. I have no personal vested interest, just wanted to remind or inform readers that it has been done in the past at a high school and police, and others who served the public came from far and wide to pay respects.
Hmm. I have to believe that all involved were faced with a difficult choice. They considered all that they needed to consider, and they made their choice. We have elected them all to represent us and they have done their job. If you don't like the job they have done, then that should be reflected in your future vote. Personally speaking, I feel that the venue of the Snow Bowl, rain or shine, is perfect. Because this really is about Kenny...not politics. Please remember that.
It's obviously time to relook at the policy. And I can't fathom why it is considered important to shelter our children from the reality of death and the comfort of the rituals we hold to say goodby. The Snow Bowl is an ok place but what if it rains? is stifling hot as it has been? What about the elderly and handicapped attendees? We taxpayers should be able to use the Strom for functions that don't interfere with the school day or school activities.
Fair enough, if the issue is past policy, but I am confused by Mr. Ithomitis saying tha funerals sensationalize issues to kids and the the decision was one of "sensitivity towards the students."
In my mother's Irish Catholic family even small children attended wakes and funerals and learned that facing death of a beloved together with family and friends signalled support, unity and the promise that all would go on together into the future.Americans have a hard time facing death realistically, but it is necessary to the maturation of a human being.
Damned if you, damned if you don't. The school board made their decision and this argumentativeness is the last thing Mr. Bailey would have wanted.
THE SCHOOLS ARE MOSTLY PAID WITH TAX DOLLARS, AND FURTHER, THE STROM AUDITORIUM WAS EXPANDED BY PRIVATE DONATIONS FROM THE COMMUNITY TO FACILITATE LARGER VENUES. WHAT HAS HAPPENED IN THE PAST, IS THE PAST. IT IS TIME THE SCHOOL BOARD RELOOKED AT THE POLICIES OF THE SCHOOL FACILITIES USE, AND UPDATE. ALL VENUES EXPECT TO PAY FOR THE SERVICES OF PERSONNEL, HEAT, LIGHTS, ETC., SO GET ON WITH IT.
THE SCHOOLS ARE MOSTLY PAID WITH TAX DOLLARS, AND FURTHER, THE STROM AUDITORIUM WAS EXPANDED BY PRIVATE DONATIONS FROM THE COMMUNITY TO FACILITATE LARGER VENUES. WHAT HAS HAPPENED IN THE PAST, IS THE PAST. IT IS TIME THE SCHOOL BOARD RELOOKED AT THE POLICIES OF THE SCHOOL FACILITIES USE, AND UPDATE. ALL VENUES EXPECT TO PAY FOR THE SERVICES OF PERSONNEL, HEAT, LIGHTS, ETC., SO GET ON WITH IT.
Thank you Tena. This situation was very unique. Indeed Ken Bailey contributed so much to the community he loved. And use of the Strom auditorium was the perfect venue to hold a celebration of his life and accomodate the number of people who want to share in that celebration. Yes, it is all about the number of people. NOT THE VENUE. There does not exist an indoor facility available to accomodate so many people. This was indeed a necessary exception to the rule due to the love and admiration of this man. I think its time for a change in the board. I think they have lost sight and direction. SHAME ON THE BOARD!! Very few people in the community will ever accomplish, have the respect, the love and admiration by young and old as Ken Bailey. SHAME ON THE BOARD!!
This is the "policy." Did you all complain every other time a memorial service was denied use of the Strom? I agree that WE own the building. It's also our right and responsibility to help set policy. How many complainers actually attend a school board meeting or take out papers to run for a school board position. We're all welcome and encouraged to so. Instead of being "appauled"...thank a school board member for her/his time and plan on running in the next election. Don't like what's going on? Do something.
I liked Ken, too. Do you think he'd want 800 people INSIDE just for him? Rain or shine we should celebrate his life outdoors - just as he did.
Just my opinion. Thank you school board.
What were you all thinking...use the Strom for something other than theatrical productions? This is a first class facility and it should be available for the whole community, they continue to pay the taxes.
Poor policy in the past does not justify poor policy going forward. Death is part of life and celebrating the life of a respected community member is nothing that students need to be sheltered from.
I think it will be perfect to have Ken's memorial at the Snow Bowl.
Thank you, Tena for your words. You have stated my feeling perfectly. Ken will be remembered for his kindness, laughter, knowledge - I could go on and on. What will the high school, board and principal be remembered for?
RIP, Ken Bailey... You will be missed by so many. So grateful the Snow Bowl doesn't only rent to parties and weddings....
I can't believe this! Shame on the school board and the principal for making such a ridiculous decision. I think the members of the school board and the principal need to remember who owns that building, it isn't them, it's the tax payers and especially with school not being in session this should not even have been in question.
Ken Bailey contributed to this and many other local communities to the point that they NEED a place the size of Strom auditorium to accomodate those that want to pay tribute to this awesome man. The school board and principal have made a disappointing statement to the community that they are suppose to serve. I think they need to look at the service Ken gave back to his community and take a lesson from it.